Our sex life as anything else in our lives changes and goes through many phases. We have the raging hormones of our teens and early 20’s, progressing into our more sophisticated 30’s and 40’s into . . . well . . . into where? For many people, as we leave our 30’s, we are well on our way to developing many other things.
As we progress through our lives major events start capitalizing our time and energy. Our careers are advancing, we have gotten married and we have kids. Three very important areas of our lives that mean the world to us, they just don’t always leave us with much energy for anything else.
Case in point for our sex life. As we battle the day to day of career-home life-kids, we find ourselves putting everything in front of our relationship with our spouse or significant other. Then by the end of the day, we are spent physically and emotionally. Our sex life and our physical connection with our mate changing into a phase that nobody wants.
With the schedule and responsibilities that we have what can you do? We have all heard schedule a date night, but for those of us that do that, what does date night usually entail? A quick bite to eat then run some errands because it’s a lot faster and easier without the kids tagging along. Definitely not the ideal date, but let’s face facts here, we are all about practicality.
Through her own personal experiences, Emma Nicholson has put together 7 Surefire Ways to Improve Your Sexlife. With Emma’s flare and sense of humour, you will see you are not alone in the struggle to keep the spark between you and your spouse. What’s even better is Emma included 7 great tips for how anyone can improve and get back to enjoying their sex life.
Here are the first two paragraphs of Emma’s story . . .
Just like many long-time married couples, my husband and I fell into a sexual black hole very quickly after our marriage seven years ago. The kids, house, our careers, the mortgage — everything, actually — took precedence over the passion that once consumed us when we were dating. For example, “BJ” no longer meant fellatio, but a pint of Ben & Jerry’s shared while watching an Ancient Alien Theories marathon. Pretty pathetic.
Both of us longed to reconnect and enjoy intimacy once again and consulted the kids’ and our schedules to nail down a good time. We would head up the stairs (while lugging laundry and toys so as not to have to make another trip), jump into bed, do the deed and then immediately jump right back up to finish the night’s chores. Needless to say, despite the physical act, no one’s boat was afloat at all.
The problem was not that we weren’t attracted to each other anymore, but rather we were not paying attention to the most erogenous zone of all: the mind. When we were dating, we enjoyed the anticipation of seeing each other and a bit more effort was made to be sexually attractive with our words and dress. My husband recently said he remembered a special naughty night when we were dating and he still thought about it to this day. That was 10 years ago!
So, I set off to turn on my husband’s mind. Here are my top tips:
Read the rest of Emma’s 7 Surefire Ways to Improve Your Sexlife here.
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