Whether we like to admit it or not, we have all had our share of blunders in the bedroom. If as you are reading this you are shaking your head, you are lying to yourself. Regardless, we are all human and we will make mistakes, or at the very least say things in the heat of passion we wish we could take back.
Obviously, we can’t take back or undo the things we’ve done, so we thought it would be fun to share some of the best stories of things not to do our readers and our experts have provided us. We are certain as you read through this list, you will recognize things that have happened to you. Enjoy the list and who knows, you may learn something after all.
Move me to Tears
Crying during sex is, well just plain weird. Even if your reaction to having the best sex of your life moves you to tears, crying is not ok. Both parties feel weird because it is not an expected emotion. Some have even reported it makes them feel their performance was terrible and others were just flat out confused.
Boy or Girl?
We are not talking about who you have as a partner, we are talking about babies. While having sex telling your partner “We’d make the cutest babies” or “I could see having kids with you someday” is a huge don’t. This can be a huge turn-off for either party. The commitment and responsibility associated with kids is a wonderful experience; that is when you are ready for it. Talking about kids during sex especially if you and your partner have never discussed it before is the wrong time.
Our lives push and pull us in many directions and from this comes to stress as well as other reasons why certain body parts may not function properly. For men, this can obviously affect their ability to have an erection.
Pushing, pulling, biting, being rough with a man’s penis to help stimulate him, unless he specifically likes roughhousing, is not a good idea. Outside of potential physical harm that can be done, mental harm can be far more damaging. If a man mentally feels he cannot perform seek help as it may be what is required to get through the mental block.
Are We Done Yet?
We thought this would be a good idea. We’ve all been there where you get caught up in the moment and having sex seems like a great idea until you are in the act. Then you realize your partner is not quite what you expected, or maybe you’re just distracted by other things happening in your life. It happens we get it, but showing a lack of interest during sex sends the complete wrong signals to your partner.
You are better off telling them you are not interested as opposed to going through the motions until they get off.
Need a Translator
If you remember the movie “A Fish Called Wanda” Kevin Klien would pretend to speak Italian to Jamie Lee Curtis’ character as it turned her on. Watching the movie you could clearly see how ridiculous this behaviour was, but it was part of the comedy. Use this as a lesson and don’t bring this into your bedroom.
Unless you are fluent in the language and your partner likes you speaking in multiple languages, keep it out. The thing that should happen in multiples is your orgasms, not the tongues you speak.
We already mentioned showing a lack of interest can ruin the mood and so can be tired. Yawning or saying how tired you fall into the category of lack of interest and is a huge buzzkill. We all know how tired you can be at the end of the day, so change up when you have sex to make sure you have the energy to enjoy.
Shhh . . .
There is always some form of talking during sex. Whether it’s dirty talk or you and your partner giving each other directions on what you like, what feels great and what you want next. Sex is no time for having a conversation, yet many people seem to think it’s a great time to talk. Save it for cuddle time afterwards.
You Went to Silent
While there is never a good time during sex to have a conversation, being completely silent is not desired either. For anyone who has ever had sex with a partner that made no noise, you know how unnerving that can be. We have some readers tell us some of the strangest stories about this where their partners would not make one single sound during sex, yet after would express how much they loved it.
If you love the feeling express yourself while it’s happening. Letting your partner know what you like based on your breathing and moans is expected and reinforces you like what they are doing.
Cute and Adorable
Two words that should never be spoken before, during or after the act of having sex when referring to any bit of your partner. This applies to women and men referring to their partner’s anatomy or even their performance. The mental anguish and confidence killer these two words can instill can have long-lasting effects.
The Academy Award Goes to . . .
Leave the acting to the professionals and don’t fake your orgasm. This only perpetuates a problem you may be having with your relationship or your partner. For women having an orgasm every time is not always required for complete sexual satisfaction. Most men think it is and faking an orgasm continues the myth.
In addition to this, if you are not getting the stimulation you need to reach an orgasm, faking will not help your partner understand what he/she is doing is not working. Let them know this and reap the rewards.
Now you know what not to do in bed, it’s time you went and enjoyed yourself. As always we appreciate all your comment and emails and don’t forget to share this information with your friends so they don’t commit one of these 10 don’ts in the bedroom.